The rumours are true, Melbourne has finally heated up.. maybe a bit too hot if I’m being fussy as this Scottish skin cannot hack it, but you can’t have everything you want. Due to the vast improvement in the weather, many many people have been flocking to the beach, including Iain and myself and oh it feels brilliant to be doing so.
Along with hotter weather comes fewer layers of clothing or skimpier outfits. There is absolutely nothing wrong with this as I am definitely a proud owner of a short dress or 10. But, as we sat on the beach it became apparent that some people believe that this lack of clothing – you are on a beach – is an invitation.
As a female, standing alone in your bikini, whilst you presumably wait for friends, is not an invitation to anyone, full stop. I would like to make this clear. Being confident in a bikini takes months of preparation and confidence building to allow yourself to feel great whilst wearing one. But, it takes just 1 second for that confidence to be gone. One woman, who was standing on the esplanade patiently waiting for her friends to arrive, was harassed by not one but two guys, from the same group.
The female was approached by a rather drunk man and then once he got rejected another guy from the same group tried his luck. However, the second man did not take no for an answer and persistently tried to get closer to her and take a picture with her (that’s what it looked like) at this point the female said;
“please leave me alone”.
Please leave me alone, should be the first sign, as the harasser, that you are intimidating this person, that she is not having fun and does not want to join in.
We were quite far away from this girl, and to go over to her would be to make a scene, but all she needed was a group of females to invite her to sit with them whilst she waited, as she would have been instantly less vulnerable. The couple sitting next to her jumped in and the girlfriend shouted at the guy saying;
“She said no, now leave her alone”
The man said, “are you her friend?”
To which the onlooker said ” no, but she can sit with us while she waits”
Are you her friend? Said, as if she wasn’t, then this man had every right to continue doing what he was doing. Wrong.
The man didn’t stop there and continued to hurl abuse at the couple, and then at an older man who had passed by, watched the event unfold, and attempt to protect the woman who was on her own. Not only did the harasser start to fight the older man but also another couple who were sitting close by who had also asked him to move on. The harasser then turned to the female of this couple and attempted to touch her.
The whole thing lasted longer than it should have because the man did not take no as an answer from anybody, until finally a female from his group dragged him away. As a female, why would you let your male friend dehumanise, harass and terrify a woman who is clearly on her own in her most vulnerable state.
To the people who attempted to defuse and protect this woman, nobody asked you to do that and that reiterates how important it is to look out for people and help those who may look particularly vulnerable or who simply need help.
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